Just stumbled upon this excellent collection of Chinese proverbs and they strike me as extremely clever and witty, yet simple and short - hailing from a seemingly better time.
Read critically, and you will find each word worth a thousand ounces of gold.
读书需用意，一字值千斤 (Dú shū xū yòng yì, yī zì zhí qiān jīn)
Play a harp before a cow
对牛弹琴 (Duì niú tán qín)
Have a mouth as sharp as a dagger but a heart as soft as tofu.
刀子嘴，豆腐心 (Dāozi zuǐ， dòufu xīn)
That's three good ones for starters, I would like to see your findings.